I wasn’t that girl that grew up reading Disney stories, but I do believe that every woman deserves her Prince Charming. I spent years in relationships that didn’t fulfill me. I’ve watched several unhappy marriages fail. I didn’t want to be that woman that settled for a marriage to someone I knew I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life with. Finally, in 2015…I said fuck it.
I followed my heart and left my man. That moment of liberation from becoming single on your own terms…that sigh of relief because you knew he wasn’t the one for you…that awakening day when settling was no longer an option…Yeah...THAT free and independent joy doesn’t last forever.
You made the best decision for you, but one day you regain your vision. The facade of love lingers and it gets harder when you are constantly surrounded by it. You’ve smiled and played the third and fifth wheel flawlessly. When is it your turn? Right?
And the married people say, “Wait. Enjoy it. There’s no need to rush.”
That thought may get you through the week, but then you get another Save the Date or an invite to another baby shower. Of course, you’re happy to witness these blessings, but isn’t it only natural to question why your path may have more snakes? More hills to climb? Sometimes you can’t help but feel like the last single woman standing.
And then, the Lord says, “Be still.”
So, you do…you chill for a little while. You pray for patience. You pray for happiness. You pray for your future husband. And then there are days, like my day today…that just fuck with you. Being single gives you the sixth sense of noticing every cute gesture of couples around you…like a love radar. Everyone seems happy as hell. Every other couple is holding hands, biking/running together, kissing, and you just happen to see the 5% of men who run to open the door for their woman…blah. It makes you wish you had selective vision.
Eventually you realize that these moments help you to determine exactly what it is that you want in a relationship. It reminds you that genuine love is out there. It reinforces the fact that settling is not an option. You can get the affection that you want and the love you deserve. But Lord knows, patience is definitely a virtue. #bishtied
At the end of the day, being single is a choice. You can be in a relationship if you really wanted. It just may not be the type of man you want. You probably wouldn’t be happy and you will miss the nights of privacy when you can write stories like this and remind other single women that you are not alone in the patience struggle. Truthfully, the decision is yours. I choose to wait.
- Submitted anonymously
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