There were times I wanted to scream at you

Scream at God 

Scream at myself

Scream out loud

But I couldn't 

I couldn't dare be disrespectful 

To raise my voice 

To raise my voice at people I love 

But I drowned in frustration

I drowned in my tears 

Reaching my hands 


Reaching out to you 

But you just stared

You stared while I drowned 

I felt the water in my lungs 

I felt my life slipping away 

I'm scared




Why won't you?...

Why won't he help me? 

Why won't he take my hand? 

I am reaching.


Why are you killing me? 

Why did he just stare? 

I'm scared. 


It hit me all at once 

The rage 

The devastation

The epiphany 

The gnawing of the truth that I tried to bury

A drowning man can't save a drowning woman

Not While he's trying to save himself 

- Makini